To answer the question up top, yes.  Genderlect is a generalization.  However, this is a generalization that should not be overlooked.  Many times the points made through genderlect do hold true, however it is important to be aware of the possible exceptions.  Communication is not just influenced by gender but by additional cultural norms.  It is also crucial to have knowledge of the culture norms it is important to ask yourself, is this person communicating this way because of who they are or because it is expected for them to communicate this way?  Deborah Tannen really stresses the significance of realizing cross-cultural communication differences.