To answer the question up top, yes.  Genderlect is a generalization.  However, this is a generalization that should not be overlooked.  Many times the points made through genderlect do hold true, however it is important to be aware of the possible exceptions.  Communication is not just influenced by gender but by additional cultural norms.  It is also crucial to have knowledge of the culture norms it is important to ask yourself, is this person communicating this way because of who they are or because it is expected for them to communicate this way?  Deborah Tannen really stresses the significance of realizing cross-cultural communication differences.

Of course, when analyzing the genderlect theory there are several outside factors that play a role in the communication tactics of men and women.  For example, ethnicity, class, age and traditional views of a culture will all impact how men and women chose to communicate.  In an article written by Deborah Tannen entitled, "Rethinking Power and Solidarity in Gender Dominance," Tannen states that through analyzing how men and women communicate we not only receive information about their gender but also about their ethnicity, class, age and tradition.  Tannen further states that it is hard to solely claim the reason why people communicate the way the do is due to their gender.  It is evident that Deborah Tannen, defender of the genderlect theory is aware of outside factor impacting communication.  This is an important realization to make, Tannen does not suggest in her studies that every man communicates the same way and every woman communicates the same way.  For full access to the article mentioned above, please visit the link below.

 Rethinking Power and Solidarity in Gender Dominance

Deborah Tannen proposes that the various styles of talk by men and women manifests itself in five major contexts.

The first context is public vs. private conversation.  Women tend to talk more in private conversations but men talk more in mixed-company public conversations.

I would definitely agree with this context.  It is widely known that women will share their secrets with a few of their best friends at a sleepover while curling up with a sappy love story movie and a bunch of food they should not be eating.  Men on the other hand will openly discuss their lives in front of anyone, say brag about their recent weekend with a girl in front of the whole locker room.

The second context is telling stories.  Men attempt to tell jokes or compelling stories in attempt to top one another while women attempt relation by showing vulnerability through self-deprecation conversation.

Everyone has heard of the awkward pick-up lines men try, "Are you from Tennessee?  Because you're the only ten I see," or "Do you have a map?  I'm getting lost in your eyes," or "I seem to have lost my phone number, can I have yours?"  I mean, the list of these awkwardly funny pickup lines could go on and on, but this is just a prime example of how men use jokes as one of their main communication tools.  Women on the other hand tend to act vulnerable, the opposite of cocky men, they devalue their worth and through that exemplify their vulnerability.  For example, women are famously known for bringing themselves down by saying how they do not feel beautiful or something along those lines.  Now, the women could in fact feel very beautiful but using self-deprecating conversation is a way their used to utilizing to relate to others.

The third context is listening.  Women tend to be active and participatory listeners while men appear and act less involved.  Women tend to take place in cooperative overlap, which is when they make a supportive interruption often meant to show agreement and solidarity with the speaker.

I would have to say that I only somewhat agree with this statement, and that says a lot since I am a woman.  While women tend to take place in a cooperative overlap which signifies agreement it could also just be a way of pretending to be listening.  I know I have certainly said, "I agree," or "That is true," or "Uh-huh" during conversations I was not particularly listening to.  So the cooperative overlap tool may not necessarily be a good sign.  Listening by a man or woman ultimately depends on who the man or woman is in conversation with and what they are talking about.

This comic strip exemplifies what I was saying:

The fourth context is asking questions.  Men do not ask questions for fear of appearing ignorant or incapable while women see asking questions as an opportunity to connect.  Women frequently ask a tag question, which is a short question at the end of a declarative statement, often used by women to soften the sting of potential disagreement or invite open, friendly dialogue.

This is a context for which, I completely agree with.  I have noticed that most men will never ask a question for themselves, but rather they use questions as a way of challenging someone's knowledge in particular a female's.  For instance, I was watching the Patriots vs. Jets game on Thanksgiving (a day and a game that I can say I am a proud Patriots fan after) and my brother misnamed one of the Patriots running backs.  Now, I got a little bit of pleasure on calling him out on this mistake, but instead of my brother actually asking what his name was he got defensive and said to me, "Why don't you name ten players on the team?"  Men almost expect themselves to know everything and embarrass only themselves when they do not know everything.  As for women and their tag questions, I find this to also be true.  So many times at the end of a conversation, I find myself using a question to get my point across in a way that might be more polite than if I said what I was really just thinking.  An example of a tag question could be saying something along the lines of, "You are joking, right?", or "Do you really believe that is true?"  The men in these situations would say, "You are out of your mind if you are being serious!", or "You are stupid if you think that is true!"  Men are not afraid of the harsh truth whereas women tend to try and sugarcoat things.     

The fifth context is conflict.  Men are more inclined to conflict.  Men are also usually aware of when they are are about to be told what to do, which is indeed a source of conflict for men.

For the most part, men are more competitive than women.  Now, that is not to say women have no competitive side because I have competed in sports my whole life and I am a female.  I think that most women recognize there is a line between competition on the fields, in the game, on a project, or whatever it may be and then the rest of their everyday lives.  For example, sometimes it is difficult for men to play an intense sports competition against someone and then see them the next day and not have built up emotions still inside them.  Most men will feel defeated if they lose, they feel a constant need to prove themselves through winning.  

Have you've ever seen the movie, She's The Man?  It is a useful resource when talking about genderlect.  Amanda Bynes' character tries to prove that women can contribute to the men's soccer team and when she is shut down by the men and their coach, she goes undercover as a male and plays on the team and does indeed lead their team to victory.  Now, yes this is a movie, however this is a realistic situation.  Most likely, if a female asked to play on an all-male team, she would be shut down and also most likely that female would be better than some of the males on that team.  Some aspects of this movie defend the ideas of genderlect, such as the men degrading the women's ability.  On the other hand, some aspects of the movie provide an exception to genderlect. such as a woman being able to communicate, act, and play like a man.

The video above of Deborah Borisoff, Professor of Media Culture and Communication at NYU, backs up the genderlect theory but will also provide proof that there are exceptions to the theory.

There is undoubtedly distinct differences among men and women.  Obviously, for one, women have the ability to give birth, while men do not share in this ability.  A less obvious difference for some to realize is the communication styles among men and women.  Theorist, Deborah Tannen, states that women communicate using rapport talk, while men communicate using report talk.  Rapport talk is, "The typical style of women, which seeks to establish connection with others" (439.  Report talk is, "The typical monologic style of men, which seeks to command attention, convey information, and win arguments" (439).  While these differences may generally hold up, there are certainly exceptions.

The above image may be an extreme portrayal of what men and women believe each other thinks about.  Notice the women's brain has much more serious topics such as babies, love and security whereas the men's brain is half filled with sex and then beer and TV.  While this portrayal is not true for all men and women, it is certainly evident in some.  Watch the clip from the show, Friends, below and you will be provided with an example to this portrayal of the male and female brains.